Anxiety

Has anyone in your family or circle of friends jokingly called you a “worry wart,” or made comments about being worried too much about things they thought were petty? Do you ever feel like you can’t concentrate on any one thing because your mind is going in many different directions? Does your heart ever feel like it is racing, chest feel tight and/or your palms sweaty? Unexplained “stomach aches”? Do you have trouble falling or staying sleeping? If you answered yes to most, or all, of these questions, you could be experiencing (generalized) anxiety. This means that there isn’t a specific trigger that brings the symptoms on. For example, it isn’t a specific phobia—fear of heights, spiders, leaving the home, etc. that causes these physical symptoms. It could come on suddenly at anytime, anywhere and for what appears to be no reason…or it can be triggered by simply by feeling worried about your week or daily “to do” list.

Anxiety is typically diagnosed when the above symptoms (as well as some others) have been occurring over a significant period of time, usually at least 6 months if not longer. Anxiety is also very common, and very treatable. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, Generalized Anxiety Disorder affects about 6.8 million adult Americans! So, if this is you, you are not alone! When the anxiety is severe, it can be very disabling. This is why it is important to seek treatment if you feel that this could be (or is) you.

There are several forms of treatment available to people experiencing anxiety. Treatment can consist of prescribed medication, psychotherapy and/or a combined method of the two.  Because we are all different, the same treatment plan does not work for everyone. This is where talking to your Physician and/or your Counselor is crucial. There are many ways that Counselor’s can help treat your anxiety and teach you methods to manage it, as well. Some of these methods for self management can include learning how to meditate, exercising and breathing techniques, and increasing coping skills.  

One of the important factors to managing your anxiety, aside from talking to your Physician and/or your counselor, is remembering that you are not alone; and you do not have to take the journey of reducing your anxiety alone, either.

-Written By Danielle Snow (Intern)

The "Mom Fear"

A few years ago when my daughter was about 7 she got a new bed.  This was one of those "fancy" bunk beds that has the bed on top with the drawers and desk in between the bottom trundle bed that you can pull out when they have a sleep over or when the situation call for a little extra sleeping space.  When we set the bed up Aubree was very excited about her new sleeping options and all the toys and junk she could store in the many cubbies and drawers in between. 


Once the bed was set up, my "mother fear" instantly kicked in.  "Wow, that is really high up there" I mumbled to myself.  My "mother fear" is what I like to call the part of me that can think of every bad thing that could possibly happen to my child and my innate instinct to try and protect her from any of the bad options.  In spite of my daughter's delight I decided to put myself at ease and make sure that the railings surrounding the top bed were high enough that they would stop her from falling off if she rolled over during the night.  I climbed up the ladder and laid on the bed.  Once I was comfortable I began rolling around from side to side to test the capability of the safety bars.  I get to a point where I felt it was pretty safe so I had to test it a bit further.  I began rolling violently from this way to that to see how hard she would have to hit the side of the rails in the middle of the night before she would fall off.  I'm sure I was quite a sight to be seen! 
Happy with my evaluation and able to quiet the voice of my fears I communicated to my daughter that she had absolutely nothing to worry about and was then able to try and share in her delight of sleeping 6 foot off the ground. 


A couple days went by and she successfully slept in her new bed however every night I continued to worry about hearing a thump in the middle of the night.  Knowing exactly that the cause of the thump would be my beautiful little girl hitting the floor because she rolled off the top of her bed. 


None of these fears were verbally communicated to her however, after a few days she began refusing to sleep on the top bunk.  We would pull out the trundle and she would sleep there for reasons that I could not figure out for the life of me.  And then one day it occurred to me.  She sat and watched my ridiculous display of thrashing around on her bed.  She watched my apprehension and could SEE my worries even though they were not communicated to her directly.  I had instilled in her that she needed to be afraid of sleeping on the top bunk.


I use this story as an example because so many times we teach our children to be fearful and to feel inadequate or anxious in simple parts of everyday life.  This experience was an eye opener for me.  Children learn what they live.  Many times the fears or inadequacies we hold in our lives are something that have been learned in us over the years, not just something we are born with.  
My question to you is what are you afraid of?  Where does it come from? Is it something you can remember learning?  I believe that if we are able to evaluate the root of our fears it is easier to challenge and confront them.
I talk about the "mom fear” and "mom guilt" a lot in the parenting classes that I teach because I truly believe that it strongly influences the way we parent our children and the way we care for ourselves.       


What is one of your "mom fears" and how do you think it affects your parenting? 

The Fear of Being True

What makes us so scared to talk about what we are really feeling.  Many times in my life I find myself holding back.  I have to consciously tell myself to be open, express my thoughts and feelings.  It seems that so many of us are programed from a young age to try and only present the very best parts of ourselves or what we perceive is the best parts of our self.  But then, what we end up doing in the end is being untrue to who we really are.  It's a shame to me how individualized our society has become.  We are encouraged by society to isolate and only depend on ourselves.  People have been so hurt by others, so many times that we as a society have learned to put up our walls of defense and not let anyone inside to see the real core of who we are.  It's scary to let other people see.  But when we do this with someone who is safe then we finally get to experience what it's like to really be who we were intended to be.  Who we are with no defenses or masks to cover the things that we think are dirty, scary, or unpresentable.  In order to be vulnerable to have to be able to understand that yes, we might get hurt, but that we won't miss out on all of the wonderful things that we cannot see when we are hiding behind the mask.